Dear Deni,

Thanks you for all your feedback and support in our recent decision to enter the lifestyle. We are fortunate for your advice and in meeting a very supportive couple for our first time that has been just as patient and understanding.

While both couples have gotten to know each other better physically and on other levels, the sex and orgasms have gotten more intense and wild with each encounter. Our second time with them turned the Mrs. into a sexual animal at one point.

Now that each spouse have been able to watch the other become intimate with the other couple, the question now is how to make the pleasure and orgasms more simultaneous among the four of us?

D&M

That is wonderful news about your weekend, honey! I am so very proud of M's considerable accomplishments at letting go and becoming aware of her inner sex goddess. And D, I know that you are almost more interested in M's satisfaction than your own, and I recognize that men tend to try to conserve their orgasm till they feel that their women are satisfied.

But there are ways to have your cock quivering in need to cum even as all of that happens to your awesome wives. As you two couples learn more and more about each other, and each person's sexual preferences, all four of you will learn how to "bring everyone up" together.

Your current method of focusing on one person at a time is one way to start that. As you all get more tuned to the other's hot spots, you will learn to have all four of you quivering like tuned crystals at the right vibrations.

Each human being has different things that really get them going. Some people have fetishes, and knowing what they are is important to bringing them to orgasm. Others are like me, where new experiences bring about new sexual responses.

What is most important is that each person feel included, treasured for themselves, and free to participate at any time in what ever way strikes their fancy. If one or two of the involved people tend to sit back and only watch, after a few times of being together, they may begin to feel subtly excluded.

I am so pleased that you and M have such a caring couple to learn with. But the size of his cock is only one (PTP) small part of the new sexual dimensions that you are discovering.

A year or so ago, a dear friend sent me a porn video of a woman who is “trying out” three men for “the first time” (wink wink). In the video, one of the men is clearly fascinated by her little clittie and tiny pussy. The cameraman only follows the actions of two of the men totally focused on jamming their big black cocks into her mouth and down her throat. But the thing that was the biggest turn on for me was how the third man, the clittie-focused-man, so enjoyed toying with her down there. His black fingers on her snow white petals (the woman was a redhead) was absolutely stunning eroticism. Yet the cameraman almost exclusively showed the other two much more aggressive males fucking her face. I could only see her clittie being toyed with periodically in the video. In fact I have told Dok about this and he is now writing a story focused on that fantasy for me!

I tell you this to illustrate that each human has their own sexual responses to any given situation. It is important to learn them. If indeed you two males are going to focus on one of the females, I would suggest that the other woman be fully involved in fondlings and kissing, and stroking as well. It appears to me that so far bi-sexuality is not welcome in the foursome. That will have to change over time for all four of you to all be “vibrating” together. Think about it, if you closed your eyes, would you really even know if a man or woman is sucking on your cock?

It is also important to recognize that what turns you on one hour may not be what turns you on the next hour, or day, or week, or month. We all change. And our sexual responses to one person may not be the same sexual responses as to another person.

Since boredom leads to being jaded, it is critical to continuously vary the touchings and kissings and fondlings and penetrations so that no one feels bored, nor feels left out.

Learn what is a turn OFF to each person. And shy away from those.

But open your minds to the reality that touching is just touching. Two pair of testicles dragging against each other has to be acceptable for two males to double penetrate a woman’s two closest portals satisfactorily. If the men refuse to give a woman her fantasy in this manner because of homophobia, the woman never gets her fantasy met. It is like feeding a baby, but never quite putting the spoon in its mouth so that it can eat. Pretty soon, the baby howls with frustration. Now if deprivation is part of a game that is mutually nourishing, that is OK, but if it never leads to fruition, then the person being teased will become disenfranchised and eventually opt out of the situation.

So, unless one of you has a fetish about voyeurism, I would make a general and flexible rule that everyone has to participate at all times (except maybe when recovering from an explosive orgasm).

Learn over time to rove the focus from person to person. Learn how to titillate each person. You have two hands, a pair of lips, a tongue, two feet, and a cock to utilize while you are arousing a sex partner. They have over thirty square feet of arousable skin. Each square inch of their skin is part of their sexual response. And each person probably has a hundred or more places on their body that can trigger arousal. Find them, use them for positive effect, and vary them during love making.

And then we come to the most arousable part of the body: the brain. The brain is what inhibits arousal as well as what makes us become aroused. Never judge another’s actions nor attempts to arouse. And be honest and proactive with each other about what turns you on . . . and off! Develop a signal of a negative response which is nonverbal, subtle, but clear. An example for me is hair pulling. I hate having the hair on my head pulled. Another example, if I can’t breathe, I go ballistic. So please don’t hold my nose and mouth to your ass, or your cock deep down my throat, and not let me control my own movements. I will be totally turned off in two seconds if a lover does those things to me.

For me, soft cooing sounds of sex played while making love can be incredibly sensual. Having music playing, or a video playing can add a whole new dimension to sex. I love the sounds of nature when I am making love.

I think you are probably beginning to get the picture.

The basic rules of “moresomes” are:
1) Participate at all times,
2) Be imaginative,
3) Do not be homophobic,
4) Be gentle unless asked to be rough,
5) Smile as you participate,
6) Gently and sincerely praise each emotional advancement any one makes,
7) Be responsive and verbal about what turns you on,
8) Save the jokes for afterwards.
9) And ALWAYS Safe, Sane, and Consensual

May the gods of explosive orgasm continue to bless each of you.

Hugs and kisses