Dear Deni

I love watching my wife take other mens cock. I
masturbate while they are doing her. Is this normal?
Jim

Dear Jim

Actually, to be honest, there is NO SUCH THING as
normal! So the better question is: does what you
do harm someone? From my vantage point, enjoying
watching your wife enjoy sex harms no one. In
fact, it benefits three people, it would appear!

So the answer to your question is “No, there is
no such thing as normal!”

So what you enjoy is NOT normal, but neither is
anything else. Every person has their own
fantasies and hang-ups. So in the end, we are
all both normal and abnormal. We are all normal
because we are human. We are al abnormal because
there is no definitive norm when it comes to sex.

So enjoy yourself as your wife is pleasured by
other males. You all win. And that’s as good as
it gets!

Deni
Samarel Sex Guide Editor
Better Sex Advice

DEAR DENI

IM 19 AND, MY BF IS 10" AND EVERY TIME WE HAVE
SEX IT KILLS ME WHEN IM ON TOP OR THE BOTTOM.
WHAT SHOULD I DO SO THAT WE BOTH CAN ENJOY THE
SEX. ALSO IT TAKES HIM A HELL OF A LONG TIME 2 COME

MONICA

Dear Monica,
Mismatches in the relative size of genitalia can
be troublesome. When I am with a man whose penis
is longer than my vagina is deep, I stay on top.
That way I can control how far he enters me. I
can also control how hard his penis trusts into
me. Most men can’t tell that their thrustings
are striking us in ways and in places that cause
us pain. And as they get closer to cumming,
Mother Nature has made them in such a way that
they innately try to deliver their spermies as
close to our cervix as they can. So they tend to
slam as deeply into us as they can.

This can cause bladder infections and other
maladies that are most definitely not fun to
endure.

So stay in control. Be in control of how quickly
they enter you as you are beginning to make love.
Control the depth of penetration. Control the
speed of penile penetration.

Men tend to cum when they are sufficiently turned
on to cause their vas deferens to begin to
rhythmically contract. If your man has trouble
reaching that tilt-over point, there can be many
causes:

- He may be distracted, therefore unable to
concentrate on his sexual thoughts.

- He may be afraid he is hurting you and
therefore can’t “get there”.

- He may have masturbated too soon before having
sex with you.

- Many men think that taking a long time gives
their woman a chance to orgasm. However if the
very act of sex is painful, obviously the quicker
they reach orgasm, the better.

So perhaps you should add other stimulus to your
love making, like sexy videos, talking about your
fantasies, reading erotic stories as you make
love, etc.

The muscular strength of your vaginal muscles is
also a critical part of stimulating him. If your
vagina is “out of shape” you may not be
stimulating his senses enough to allow him to
reach fruition. EVERY woman should be exercising
her vaginal muscles every day. Exercising your
pussy at least four times a day is critical.
There are several tips already on this site for
you to read about how to do that.

Let me know if these tips are helpful, Monica.
Or give me more input so we can delineate other
problems, OK?

Deni
Samarel Sex Guide Editor
Better Sex Advice