Dear Deni,
Have read a couple of your articles and I think your hitting the nail on its head Well-done!!

I am a 29 year old Male and entertaining the idea to go for the 'snip' (losing the turtle neck). I need to know if this will be beneficial for ‘her’ does it make a noticeable difference? I would like to try this as I have read there's a number of benefits to the male.

Kind Regards
Jan

Dear Jan,

You are considering a big step. Let’s point out a few salient things as we discuss this. I have been told by men who had it done later in life, such as yourself, that it is a very painful as you recover.

Let’s start with the reason God gave men a foreskin. Research shows that the foreskin does several useful things for a man.

First, the foreskin protects the glans of the penis from constant friction and rubbing as a man moves throughout his day. Studies show that men with their foreskin intact retain higher sensitivity of their glans as they age. Higher sensitivity guarantees fewer incidences of erectile dysfunction, as well as satisfying sex at a more advanced age..

Also, when entering a woman that may not yet be sufficiently aroused to be naturally lubricated at her opening, the intact foreskin permits the foreskin of your penis to act as a “separator” of her inner labia, making penetration much easier and probably less painful for her. Think about it. As your erect penis begins to slide down your foreskin, the foreskin starts to extrude and separate. The labia of the woman will tend to stick to the foreskin, pulling the her labia apart as you continue to penetrate her. That benefits both men and women!

OK, now the bad part about a foreskin. There are studies that show a slightly increased incidence of penile cancer in males with an intact foreskin. The increase is not large, in fact as I understand it, is less than 2% increase in penile cancer. Not a very high number unless you happen to be one those men in the two percent.

Second, the intimate contact of your foreskin to your glans can cause odor problems if you not carefully and faithfully cleansing that area.

Frankly, I love finding a new lover has his foreskin intact. So few American men do these days. But that does not mean I value a man who is circumcised any less. Every penis, regardless of medical differences, is unique and has its own personality. I love finding out their personalities!

Let me know what you decide to do.

Deni
Samarel Sex Guide Editor
Better Sex Advice

Dear Deni,
I am a reader and "fan"...hope you can give me some good advice. I am a 40 yo woman, very happily married, and a "sexual adventurer" of sorts, my hubby and I are open minded and liberated I guess you could say. (No kids)

I have always been attracted sexually to both men and women, and had an "encounter" in high school with a very pretty girl. She was emotionally attached, and kinda turned me off the whole "girl girl" thing. I have been hetero ever since. But lately, I have been thinking about this again. A friend in London has what she calls a "girl sex club” which is simply a time each week for close friends to get together to discuss and play...hair, nails, clothes, and also sex with toys...etc. This really sounds great to me, and I am invited...but, the distance from me to London is prohibitive for any regular visits.

Also I just started a new job, and getting away is out of the question for at least a year. I talked to my guy about this and he is OK with it. He just doesn't want me to get involved w/ someone and leave him, which I will not do. I love him to death...

Sooo...long intro to my question. How do I attract women? I am in great shape, and have a great figure. I work out a lot. Men tend to follow me around, so I know how to do that, but no idea how to "hook" women. I have been noticed, but have no idea what the motivation is. Is there a clothing or jewelry "Clue" that I can display to let others know I'm interested? Or is it better to post personal....help!! I don't know what to do, and I trust your advice..

love
SuZy

Dear SuZy,

You sound like a darling! Wish you were here, I could easily introduce you to lots of interested women. Me being one of them of course.

I also applaud your openness with your husband. This openness will give you both peace of mind, and more freedom to pursue your desires. Include him in your fond memories of your dates and relationships so that he does not feel like there is danger to his love for you.

But your question is, really, how do I get those dates? The easiest way is to visit a gay bar oriented toward women. Almost every city of any size has one. Do an internet search.

Once around a tempting target, how do you tell if they are interested? Luckily, you are in England, where women tend not to be so secretive and closed mouthed about their sexual preferences as they are here in America.

Remember, WELL OVER HALF of all women have fantasies about being with another woman. So your real question is ‘How do you get a woman you are attracted to to admit she wants the same thing you do?’

The answer is, become friends! Flirting friends.

Flirting is the art of showing that you are attracted to another person. Eye contact is the easiest signal. Not looking away when they see you looking at them tells them you want to be friends. Follow that by a genuine smile as you continue to look at them softly, even wistfully. Arch your eyebrow in question, as if saying, “Want to be friends?”

After you meet, be as open and honest with your new friend as you are with your husband. Find erotic stories that you want to share with her, allowing her to respond with her own fantasies. Within a few weeks, you will be close enough to ask her outright if she has any fantasies about bi-sexual encounters.

Don’t be afraid to dress provocatively when you are with her. Compliment her on her own appearance, especially if she responds to your mode of dress and begins to dress sexily. Let your eyes linger on her curves and good points. Smile wistfully as you look at her figure.

Suggest to her that you watch videos together, of women that are erotically linked. There are a number of good bi-sexual movies out, romantic and well done. Ask at your video store. Or pick a store outside your neighborhood if you are too embarrassed at your regular video store. If you have a service like Netflix in England, you can even order them through the mail! I love my Netflix subscription. My girlfriends and I watch videos together often.

In the end, you want a friend that you can trust to be with, to enjoy, to make love to. With the right lover, it can be very good. With the wrong lover, just like with men, it can be wretched.

I wish you good hunting, sweetheart. Drop me a line to keep me apprised of your progress!

Deni
Samarel Sex Guide Editor
Better Sex Advice